Understanding Trauma in the Body After Birth
You’re Not Overreacting—You’re Responding
If you’ve ever thought, “Why can’t I just move on?” or “Why does this still bother me?”, this is for you.
If you flinch when someone mentions birth. If you shut down during or even at the thought of sex. If you find yourself clenching your jaw or snapping at your partner for reasons you can’t name.
That’s not you being dramatic. That’s not you failing. That’s your body doing what it learned to do to survive something overwhelming.
Trauma after birth isn’t always loud. Sometimes it whispers. Sometimes it numbs. Sometimes it simmers just beneath the surface. But no matter how it shows up—it’s valid. And it’s real.
Trauma Isn’t Just in Your Head—It’s in Your Body
We live in a culture that talks about postpartum depression and anxiety but skips over the somatic responses that come from trauma:
Rage that seems to erupt out of nowhere
Shutdown that leaves you numb, foggy, checked out
Shame that whispers you should be "over this by now"
Startle responses that make your heart race from a slammed door
Hypervigilance that makes rest feel impossible
These aren’t personal defects. They’re biological responses to perceived threat. Your nervous system isn’t malfunctioning—it’s protecting you.
Why Birth Trauma Lives in the Body
Birth is an embodied experience. So is trauma. That means your brain isn’t the only one carrying the memory—your muscles, fascia, organs, and nervous system remember too.
If you felt trapped, unsafe, dismissed, violated, or powerless during birth or loss, your body took note. It doesn’t matter what the chart says. It doesn’t matter if the outcome was "healthy baby." What matters is how you experienced it.
That’s why symptoms linger even when people say, "It’s over now."
Common Somatic Trauma Responses After Birth
Every body is different, but here are some of the most common ways trauma shows up in postpartum bodies:
Muscle tension: Jaw, neck, shoulders, pelvic floor
Digestive issues: Nausea, IBS, constipation
Sleep disturbances: Difficulty falling or staying asleep, vivid nightmares
Sexual pain or avoidance: Discomfort, fear, or lack of desire
Emotional flooding: Intense fear, sadness, or anger seemingly out of proportion
These symptoms are not random. They’re signals. Invitations. They’re your body’s way of saying, something happened here.
Shame is a Symptom, Not a Fact
So many of my clients say the same thing: “I should be over this.”
Let’s pause here: That sentence? That’s shame talking. Not truth.
Shame is the internalization of unacknowledged pain. It’s what we feel when no one names our trauma, when we’re left alone with our story, when our body is trying to tell the truth but we keep being told to smile and move on.
You are not weak for struggling. You are not broken because your body is holding the score. You are reacting exactly the way a nervous system reacts to trauma.
Rage, Numbness, Avoidance: These Are Trauma Responses
That outburst at your partner?
The disconnection from your baby?
The way you freeze when someone mentions the birth?
These aren’t character flaws. These are survival strategies. Your body is trying to stay safe in a world that didn’t feel safe before.
And the best news? These patterns can shift. With care, with time, and with the right support.
You Don’t Have to Heal Alone
Sometimes talking isn’t enough. Because trauma doesn’t just live in language—it lives in the tissues. That’s where somatic work comes in.
Somatic reflection and trauma-informed coaching invite your body into the healing process. We slow down. We listen. We name what was never named. And we begin to build safety from the inside out.
You don’t have to dive headfirst. You don’t have to retraumatize yourself. But you do get to get curious. You get to ask your body: What do you need right now?
What’s Next?
If this resonates, here are two gentle invitations:
Book a one-off 1:1 somatic coaching session — A safe space to explore what your body is holding and how to begin letting go. You don’t have to commit to a series. Just come as you are.
Download the somatic reflection guide — Available to all members. This guide offers journal prompts and embodied practices to begin building a relationship with the body that’s been carrying so much.
Resources
Final Words
Your reactions make sense. Your body is not betraying you—it’s protecting you. You don’t have to hate your body for what it’s holding.
There is wisdom here. There is information here. And there is healing—on your timeline, in your own way, with support that honors the whole of you.